From Siberia With Love

Today Bobby Warcop, Commissioner of the RCMP, announced that an investigation has been opened into allegations of interference in the upcoming Canadian election by the Siberian Federation.

Map of the Siberian Federation

There have been many allegations in recent years of Siberian Federation interference in foreign elections. The most notable instance of this was during the recent New Frengland election, where Siberia was said to have strongly influenced the outcome.

The investigation began after a tipoff that the Cyborg Party might have very close ties to Siberia. According to Commissioner Warcop, their informant has alleged Cyborg Party leader, Hon. Sarah Ogruk of Niagara West, is not a Canadian citizen, but rather a Siberian bot.

Hon. Sarah Ogruk, Niagara West

We were initially skeptical, given that if anybody in the Cyborg Party was a bot they would surely have some sort of Twitter presence, but Commissioner Warcop explained the alleged plan had nothing to do with voter influence.

“I understand how you would expect Siberian interference to again be linked to the spread of information through social media, but this plan is much more complex,” he explained, “Apparently the Siberians have found a way to modify the results of the election. They seem to be planning to manipulate results to give the Cyborg Party a supermajority, the Prime Minister would then push through bills at Siberian request without opposition.”

When questioned about how this plan dealt with Senate approval the Commissioner indicated that they were not ready to release any more information, but the results of the investigation will be made public as soon as possible.

We reached out to the Cyborg Party for comment but only received “01011001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110011 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100111 01100001 01101101 01100101” as a reply.